Reality Re-Caps and musings ('cause you know i'm an addict)
Yes, it's true, I watch lots and lots of reality televsion: it started with tuning into the original Real World New York, on MTV lo those many years ago, when reality was just an excuse to lower your production budget and get away with trying out weird cinema verite jump cuts and interspersing Duran Duran video cliches to the delight of Gen-Xers everywhere.
So many years later I realize that the Real World was just a gateway show, and that there is so much in the marketplace it's really hard to choose: do I want to see something uplifting, something psycho, something funny, some great feat, some amazing skill? What do I want? It seems it's all out there. I could watch Survivor, and see a bunch of people so attached to their alpha dog statuses that they let a beta slip through to win; I could watch Project Runway and see all of the folks bullied for being "different" in high school get the validation they have searched for all of their lives; I could watch Extreme Makeover Home Edition, and get a guaranteed boo-hoo ugly cry moment, as some truly deserving family recieves the granite countertop that dreams are made of; I could watch America's Next Top Model and learn to walk in high heels from Miss Jay, the drag queen of life.
So many moods, so many choices. I also regularly tune into the Amazing Race (the reality red-headed step child; so good and yet completely underwatched); Big Brother (really, really, really and I mean really dumb but the best way to pass time in the summer); Real World/Road Rules Challenges, Laguna Beach, True Life, Made . . . oh, MTV, I know I'm too old for you, but I can't resist!
The toss up for me this week is between America's Next Top Model and the show that tides us over between Project Runway seasons, Top Chef.
On ANTM it's time for Miss Jay to teach this season's wannabes how to walk on a runway. Showing up in a fabulous black YSL smoking over a long black column, he struts his stuff on the intro. Of course the girls follow, one by one, and most fail miserably. The scene is worth watching because Jay finally gets a crack at the girl who auditioned with what he called "Daffy Duck come and get it boys" walk. You have to see it to believe it. It's also kind of sad to see that Jade's huge ego has suffered some massive blows-- she seems to be holding back during the walk-a-thon, despite inexplicably strutting down the runway with a massive head-shawl wrap combo that looks like Banneker's 1986 Senior Fashion Show. Ain't no reason, Miss Jade. Ain't no reason.
On Top Chef, it's the clash of the egos. I've always known that head chefs were changeable, moody maniacs whose ego barely allowed their swelled heads to fit in the kitchen, but who knew that aspiring chefs were such utter asses? Stephen the Sommelier (who completely upstages me in the Pretensious Use of French Category, folks, by pronouncing sommelier in French italics and using it, like, every single chance he gets) feels compelled to rip his teammate, Candice the Novice/Model, to shreds right before the start of the challenge. Granted, Candice is no brain trust: "Okay, so you like, know big words and stuff, so what? Just shut up!" and she like, totally, totally, has a point, because Stephen's stupid comeback is: "You will fail and you will not succeed." I mean, WTF? Who are you, wine boy? I'll tell you who-- you're the idiot who suggested cooking melon soup puree for 10 year olds at the Boys and Girls Club! I mean, come on people! The elimination sequence is not to be missed-- egos on parade. I've never seen anything like it.
So if you can catch either one of those in re-runs, I highly recommend . . . but also, since MTV tends to re-run everything in big chunks, if you can catch Kina dishing out some whupass on this Season's Real World/Road Rules Gauntlet, it is NOT to be MISSED. I don't say this lightly-- she is hella badass, y'all. I would not want to meet that chick in a dark alley.
So many years later I realize that the Real World was just a gateway show, and that there is so much in the marketplace it's really hard to choose: do I want to see something uplifting, something psycho, something funny, some great feat, some amazing skill? What do I want? It seems it's all out there. I could watch Survivor, and see a bunch of people so attached to their alpha dog statuses that they let a beta slip through to win; I could watch Project Runway and see all of the folks bullied for being "different" in high school get the validation they have searched for all of their lives; I could watch Extreme Makeover Home Edition, and get a guaranteed boo-hoo ugly cry moment, as some truly deserving family recieves the granite countertop that dreams are made of; I could watch America's Next Top Model and learn to walk in high heels from Miss Jay, the drag queen of life.
So many moods, so many choices. I also regularly tune into the Amazing Race (the reality red-headed step child; so good and yet completely underwatched); Big Brother (really, really, really and I mean really dumb but the best way to pass time in the summer); Real World/Road Rules Challenges, Laguna Beach, True Life, Made . . . oh, MTV, I know I'm too old for you, but I can't resist!
The toss up for me this week is between America's Next Top Model and the show that tides us over between Project Runway seasons, Top Chef.
On ANTM it's time for Miss Jay to teach this season's wannabes how to walk on a runway. Showing up in a fabulous black YSL smoking over a long black column, he struts his stuff on the intro. Of course the girls follow, one by one, and most fail miserably. The scene is worth watching because Jay finally gets a crack at the girl who auditioned with what he called "Daffy Duck come and get it boys" walk. You have to see it to believe it. It's also kind of sad to see that Jade's huge ego has suffered some massive blows-- she seems to be holding back during the walk-a-thon, despite inexplicably strutting down the runway with a massive head-shawl wrap combo that looks like Banneker's 1986 Senior Fashion Show. Ain't no reason, Miss Jade. Ain't no reason.
On Top Chef, it's the clash of the egos. I've always known that head chefs were changeable, moody maniacs whose ego barely allowed their swelled heads to fit in the kitchen, but who knew that aspiring chefs were such utter asses? Stephen the Sommelier (who completely upstages me in the Pretensious Use of French Category, folks, by pronouncing sommelier in French italics and using it, like, every single chance he gets) feels compelled to rip his teammate, Candice the Novice/Model, to shreds right before the start of the challenge. Granted, Candice is no brain trust: "Okay, so you like, know big words and stuff, so what? Just shut up!" and she like, totally, totally, has a point, because Stephen's stupid comeback is: "You will fail and you will not succeed." I mean, WTF? Who are you, wine boy? I'll tell you who-- you're the idiot who suggested cooking melon soup puree for 10 year olds at the Boys and Girls Club! I mean, come on people! The elimination sequence is not to be missed-- egos on parade. I've never seen anything like it.
So if you can catch either one of those in re-runs, I highly recommend . . . but also, since MTV tends to re-run everything in big chunks, if you can catch Kina dishing out some whupass on this Season's Real World/Road Rules Gauntlet, it is NOT to be MISSED. I don't say this lightly-- she is hella badass, y'all. I would not want to meet that chick in a dark alley.
posted by mocha mayhem @ 10:16 AM
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