The Latest Hollywood Accessory
Have you seen Failure to Launch? Do you watch The L Word? Okay, have you seen Angelina Jolie lately? What do all of these things have in common? The latest Hollywood accessory-- the cute little unexplained Black kid. Okay, so at least with Angelina there was the big brouhahah and false stories about her snatching her cute li'l Ethiopian child (although why she had to go abroad for a Black baby remains a mystery) from some poor unsuspecting 18 year old who was just trying to give birth in peace. Tell me you're not tired of seeing her toting that little girl around and worrying about who's going to teach her how to do her hair! I feel like she needs a Lustrasilk gift basket. Anyway, it's like we're not supposed to question Angelina on this decision . . . which seems to boil down to creating a cadre of exotic children that will be like Michael Jackson's exotic menagerie at Wonderland.
On The L Word, Bette and Tina are trying to um, create a family that um, somewhat looks like what their kids would look like if that were biologically feasible. Bette picked out the donor-- a huge Black guy who was also and up-can-coming artist, so that the kid would also have her love of all things visually shocking. But wait; now they're on the the rocks . . . Tina's dating a white guy (the "guy" being the shocker on the show). . . poor Angelica has just become a cute accessory that gets cooed over by elderly white people in a restaurant who say to Tina (Angelica's BIOLOGICAL MOTHER!) "our kids adopted too!" And um, no, Tina does not correct them . . . and then later the guy actually tells her that her "past choices are okay" with him. Because you know, everyone makes mistakes!
Finally, we have Failure to Launch, which yes, I know has so many plot holes in it, it's not even a donut. Nevermind the fact that we're supposed to buy that Matthew McConaughey and Sarah Jessica Parker are matched in age (there is nothing wrong with being over 40 and dating a younger guy; just don't pretend like you're not dating younger, and that it's not weird that you're living with someone who is clearly 15 years younger than you, making you somewhat of a candidate for a little life-intervention your damn self!). Nevermind the fact that it was shot all over the South-- Oxford, Maryland; New Orleans, LA; South Carolina; Alabama . . . pick a location and an accent, PEOPLE! The burning question in my head was-- why did good ol' Matt have to introduce the sweet-faced little Black boy with no front teeth as his "nephew"? And why did Bradley Cooper have to turn to SJP more than half-way through the film and say, "hey, it's not really his nephew; you know 'cause he's an only child." That was the weirdest moment of all in that flick, and it made me so happy to be back in DC, no longer seeking the Hollyweirdness.
If you want to see multiculturalism at work, where it's not forced and no one is patting him or herself on the back for being ultra liberal and not "noticing" someone's race, check out Grey's Anatomy. Love that show-- Sandra Cho is my girl, and she's hooked up with my boy Isaiah Washington who is FOINE, and it's really much more about the clash of their personalities and positions and not the fact that she's Chinese-American and he's Black. But they also don't like, skirt it. Or pretend it doesn't exist. Because, you know . . . this is America, where we haven't quite gotten there yet.
On The L Word, Bette and Tina are trying to um, create a family that um, somewhat looks like what their kids would look like if that were biologically feasible. Bette picked out the donor-- a huge Black guy who was also and up-can-coming artist, so that the kid would also have her love of all things visually shocking. But wait; now they're on the the rocks . . . Tina's dating a white guy (the "guy" being the shocker on the show). . . poor Angelica has just become a cute accessory that gets cooed over by elderly white people in a restaurant who say to Tina (Angelica's BIOLOGICAL MOTHER!) "our kids adopted too!" And um, no, Tina does not correct them . . . and then later the guy actually tells her that her "past choices are okay" with him. Because you know, everyone makes mistakes!
Finally, we have Failure to Launch, which yes, I know has so many plot holes in it, it's not even a donut. Nevermind the fact that we're supposed to buy that Matthew McConaughey and Sarah Jessica Parker are matched in age (there is nothing wrong with being over 40 and dating a younger guy; just don't pretend like you're not dating younger, and that it's not weird that you're living with someone who is clearly 15 years younger than you, making you somewhat of a candidate for a little life-intervention your damn self!). Nevermind the fact that it was shot all over the South-- Oxford, Maryland; New Orleans, LA; South Carolina; Alabama . . . pick a location and an accent, PEOPLE! The burning question in my head was-- why did good ol' Matt have to introduce the sweet-faced little Black boy with no front teeth as his "nephew"? And why did Bradley Cooper have to turn to SJP more than half-way through the film and say, "hey, it's not really his nephew; you know 'cause he's an only child." That was the weirdest moment of all in that flick, and it made me so happy to be back in DC, no longer seeking the Hollyweirdness.
If you want to see multiculturalism at work, where it's not forced and no one is patting him or herself on the back for being ultra liberal and not "noticing" someone's race, check out Grey's Anatomy. Love that show-- Sandra Cho is my girl, and she's hooked up with my boy Isaiah Washington who is FOINE, and it's really much more about the clash of their personalities and positions and not the fact that she's Chinese-American and he's Black. But they also don't like, skirt it. Or pretend it doesn't exist. Because, you know . . . this is America, where we haven't quite gotten there yet.
posted by mocha mayhem @ 9:49 AM
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